When summer turned into the fall
by melinda08
Summary: The day finally came that Carmela had feared throughout her entire marriage to Tony Soprano. In loving memory of Tony Soprano and the gifted actor who portrayed him, James Gandolfini.


It was the day Carmela had always known would come, but somehow, in her own mind, had tried and tried to block out throughout the years. It was a dangerous world her husband lived-had lived-in, but still, to realize she'd now officially joined the New Jersey Garbage Distribution Widow club, well...it was too much. Just too much.

Meadow, who somehow had managed to turn into a fine young lady, wiser than her years would suggest, knocked patiently on her mother's bathroom door. "Mom...are you ready? It's time..."

"I just need another minute, Mead..." Carmela called out as she struggled to find the right shade of lipstick. Nope, she wiped that off. There would be nothing distracting or suggestive about her appearance.

"Mom, Uncle Paulie called. They're waiting on you..."

"I'm coming, GODDAMMIT!"

Realizing what she'd just said, and how she'd just talked to her daughter, Carmela slowly opened the bathroom door, and it was hard to say who initiated, but both mother and daughter found themselves in the midst of an embrace of a lifetime.

Carmela had tried to keep it together. It had been just a few days when...when...the "accident" happened. Accident, her ass. The breaks on his car had clearly been tampered with. But with Tony's history, there was yet to be found in all of New Jersey one sympathetic cop. Now as she issued one apology after another, Meadow just patted her mom's back, fighting back her own tears.

AJ watched the scene in the distance. He knew he was man of the family. It should have been him telling his mom to come on, to help his sister talk to their mother, to do something. But as he felt like a stranger from another planet in his formal wear, he sat back and said nothing.

Finally, Meadow let go of her mother. She grabbed a tissue and lovingly wiped the tears from her mother's face. Unfortunately, all the time and effort Carmela had put into her appearance had been in vain, for her tears had smeared her mascara, leaving streaks that even the tissue couldn't remove.

"AJ!" Meadow looked at her brother. He stepped into his room, then came out and handed a pair of his sunglasses to his mother.

"It's okay, Mom," Meadow smiled as she helped her mother place the dark glasses on.

After a few brief touch ups, Carmela realized she couldn't put it off any longer, and they all, the remaining Soprano family, left the house to the one event they couldn't escape.

0000

They'd all spoken at the service, his friends and family, well, both families. The only one who couldn't say anything was AJ, which mildly irritated Meadow for some reason.

Carmela had kept watch on the back of the room, halfway expecting to see Tony conducting business even in the darkness of a funeral home. They'd been to too many funerals.

No, Tony was not going to be conducting business in New Jersey anymore.

0000

It was a beautiful sunny day, clear blue sky, and actually Carmela found herself grateful for the shades that her son had provided her. Thank God he'd done something for the family that day, she sighed bitterly.

Paulie sat with Carmela and her children, representing the ever lessening facet of New Jersey that had once inspired fear and terror in its' enemies.

Christopher. Gone. Sil. Gone. . Bobby. Gone. Pussy. Gone. Adriana, missing and what Carmela presumed, Gone. The list went on and on, but right now the only thing- the only one mattered to her was Tony.

As they all watched the coffin lowered into the ground, it was all Carmela could do to stay back herself, but still, she had her kids. She looked at the fancy jewelry she wore that day, only a small representation of all the gifts Tony had given her over the years. She'd trade them all in a heartbeat for just one more day, one more I love you, one more family supper, one more...anything.

After the minister concluded his words, with the Feds still even at this time keeping watch from a distance, Carmela sat frozen in her chair, unable to process her next move. Both Paulie and Meadow put their hands over hers, but even they knew nothing they could say or do could make things better for her.

AJ watched and took a deep breath. He shocked everybody by standing up and walking to where the minister had just stood minutes before. Everyone watched and wondered what in the world he was doing.

AJ calmly took a deep breath.

He looked up in the sky, and though no one would blame him, they all, Carmela included, expected him to break down or make a scene.

Instead, he pointed up to the sky.

Ever so briefly, everyone wondered why AJ stood pointing, and even more oddly, smiling.

It didn't take Carmela or Meadow long at all to see why he was smiling.

A small drove of Canadian Geese were flying by, and the sight and sounds of them made Carmela break into laughter through her tears.

Paulie was confused, but Meadow, by this time also both crying and smiling, just shook her head and mouthed the words "it's okay."

Dr. Melfi, who usually wouldn't or couldn't attend such events, stood in the background, sharing in the Soprano family's private moment of unexplained joy.

The geese. Tony Soprano had always loved those damn geese that had once swam in his pool.

As the last of the geese finished honking and flying by, everyone grew silent again.

Carmela stood up and walked up to her son.

AJ was scared, wondering if he'd done the wrong thing.

Carmela wrapped her arms around her boy and kissed both of his cheeks. "He'd never-a-been prouder of you, AJ." She whispered in her son's ear, only he knew the words she'd said to him.

AJ wrapped his arm around his mother, and with everyone, including Meadow, watching, both mother and son held their heads high as they walked to Carmela's car.

Tony Soprano. Call him a mobster. Call him a friend. Call him whatever you wanted, but one thing was undeniable- the man was so special, even his aviary feathered friends came by to pay respect.

Tony himself would have loved the irony of the moment.

Every time Carmela would bake a lasagna, she'd think of Tony. Every time she'd hear a Frankie Valli song, she'd think of him. Every time she walked downstairs she'd think of him and wonder when he'd come downstairs in that damn robe of his.

And the pool...

It was late in the evening, and Carmela and her children, both of Tony's sisters and their children, and Paulie all sat around the pool for the last time that summer. Artie was there too, not as a caterer or anything else but just someone who'd also loved Tony Soprano.

One by one, they each lifted their glass to pay respect to the man who'd angered, hurt, frustrated, cared for and loved each one of them in his own way.

And as the sun set down on the Soprano family home, no more words that night would be said. They all had their own special memories of Tony Soprano, and for that night forward, that would be all they had left.

The end

RIP James Gandolfini. Thank you.


End file.
